Please, Ask Me About My Faith

Rather than quietly judging as we all so easily do

Jonas Ellison

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I went through a long season of life where I wanted nothing to do with religion — particularly Christianity. The way I saw it, Christians were… weird. They were motheaten, uninteresting simpletons. They were judgemental, tribal, racist, anti-environmental, and anti-intellectual (among other obvious descriptors).

I’ve written about this before, but about five years ago, I worked with this one guy. I’ll call him ‘Mike’. Mike was a nice guy. We hit it off pretty quickly. Our wives even met a time or two at work functions and they seemed to get along as well. Mike and his wife had a couple of small kids who were around Rory’s age with another on the way. And they lived by us. It seemed like a nice opportunity for a budding friendship (which was great because, let’s face it, it’s damn hard making new friends when you’re an adult — especially after having kids).

My friends in the office saw this friendship taking root and decided to intervene. They had something important to tell me. Something vital to my well-being…

One day, this gal I worked with pulled me aside at the tribal fire (aka the office coffee machine). She informed me, with a hushed tone and a sharp gaze, that Mike (gulp) was a Christian. Yeah, he’s, like, super into it.

This couldn’t be happening. Immediately all of these images sprung to mind. He and his wife wearing special underwear (because Christians do that, right?), saying horribly sanctimonious prayers before dinner, not allowing their kids to… do anything besides read the Bible and do manual labor. I saw a future of getting stuck in a friendship where Mike and his wife would try to convert us into joining their church and passive-aggressively judging and guilting us if we didn’t. They’d talk about how Rory is such a heathen child before going to bed at night (and they likely slept in separate twin beds so as to, ya know, leave room for Jesus).

Mike eventually even came out about it to me. It was true… Mike. Was a Christian. He didn’t tell me this overtly, he’d just mentioned the transformation that he and his wife had just experienced at a Christian couples retreat. He told me it saved their marriage and he was so grateful…

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Jonas Ellison

Not here on Medium much anymore. Head over to my Substack to see the latest: jonasellison.substack.com 👍🙏🤙